Posts by Roscoe
Transitioning from just for fun to make it faster.
Bombing this turd around our little track has been a blast but since it refuses to die, the time has come to address some specific issues keeping the experience from the best version of itself. The fact that we get to test some hardware along the way is a major bonus. The biggest issue has…
Read MoreRelive your childhood. Buy this car with styling inspired by the Little Tykes Cozy Coupe & Barney the Dinosaur.
When buying a car, Do you put ridiculous styling and a low price before all other considerations? With styling, performance, and ergonomics inspired by a child’s driveway toy, most folks would consider this thing a poor choice when it was new. Not you! Maybe you work from home and don’t have anywhere to go anyway.…
Read MoreHanging curtains in a haunted house.
It has been way too much fun running this thing around our little track and the time has come to make a few changes. The current suspension is lowering springs wrapped around blown stock struts. It just so happens that Fortune Auto, a company that makes custom coilovers, is right across the river from us.…
Read MoreAre you good at fixing lawnmowers, like meeting cops and have a buddy with a tow truck?
You are gonna love this Integra. This thing checks off all the boxes for any serious Honda street racer. Faded spray paint job. Wing you big enough to create lift. Engine parts from other Hondas. eBay parts including a Wuhan war whistle. Giant inefficient front mount intercooler. Loudest available compressor bypass valve. Doesn’t run so…
Read MoreCan we kill it?
Some vehicles are just worth more to have fun in than they would return in a retail sale. This forester was one of those vehicles but I never would have guessed the smiles per gallon this thing delivers. I figured a solid hour of fun was going to be had with this thing in the…
Read MoreReady to challenge the Boss Karen in your neighborhood? You NEED this “antique” service van
Escalate the battle with your local HOA in a way only a junky old service van can. It’s under the 10k mark so in most localities it’s not considered a commercial vehicle, it’s an antique so a set of collector car tags will make it legal without an inspection, and best of all? This thing…
Read MoreIt’s tax time. Somebody’s baby momma is about to buy them this car.
Do you buy your baby daddy a car at tax time each year? Why spend your hard-earned tax return on another piece of crap car & a set of rims that are just gonna cart him between his momma’s house, his friend’s houses, and the job he doesn’t have when you could keep him at…
Read MoreAre you into burnouts, picking up dudes, and plowing thru crowds of spectators?
Boy, are we about to make your day. This mustang has it all. It’s a V6 with dual exhaust and a 5 Speed. Perfect for the “my V6 is as fast as your V8” crowd. It’s already wrecked so you won’t feel bad when you plow thru a pole in a parking lot and the…
Read MoreMore miles on it than your mom & can handle 15 dudes at once. 2009 Ford Passenger Van
The front end is a little loose, the intake & rear both leak a little, and getting her started takes a special trick with the shifter. There is also a little surface corrosion underneath but we all know you like to live dangerously. She will start run and move but once you get her going…
Read MoreKill Cones and put trash cans into low orbit with this beast old truck.
Have you ever dreamed of a cone-kill trashcan terminating porta-potty plowing escapade in an old truck? We have the truck you need right here. There are enough inspection-failing items to make this truck legitimately dangerous and the length of time it’s been since its last wash and now, completes the “look” to go with it.…
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